Your energetic account balance is low.
Are you tired? Like, not just tired, but WEARY?
Me too. And almost every single person I know, too.
I've been explaining it to myself with a banking metaphor:
it's been a very energetically expensive two years,
and pandemic life has drained our accounts.
via GIPHY
Here's what I mean.
Perhaps you are fortunate enough to have more than one bank account.
You have your checking account, which you use for everyday in- and outflow of money.
And you have your savings account(s), where you keep your reserves.
Likewise:
You have your day-to-day energy fund, where you make deposits with eating/sleeping/resting/care-receiving/faith
and you make debits with working/householding/exercising/caregiving/worry.
Any overflow goes into your energy reserves - your energetic savings account -
where you make larger deposits with a good vacation, or a couple days off, or an excellent time with friends.
So.
In the beforetimes, if life got a little hectic or challenging,
we were able to draw on our energy reserves.
We didn't have a lot, but we did have some.
But after the last two (really six) years?
Those are gone.
We're spent.
Everyday life has been extra EXTRA demanding of our energy,
and so many of the things we do to make energetic deposits
have been unavailable.
And when we do get to rest,
we find a nap, or a day off, doesn't go as far as it used to.
Energetically, we're living paycheck to paycheck.
And it shows.
*
We're finding this spent-ness manifesting in frustrating ways.
We have less focus.
Less stamina: mentally, emotionally, physically.
And we're apt to blame ourselves for that.
“It's only 2:30p - what's wrong with me that I can't work a minute longer?”
“Why didn't I exercise today? It's not like I went anywhere.”
“How did I work all day and only get this one thing done?”
It's not you, though.
It's all of us.
Times 10/20/50/10000 for those of us who've also been navigating
racism
misogyny
queerphobia
depression and anxiety
health challenges
huge life changes
illnesses and deaths of loved ones
anti-mask/anti-vax neighbors
negative balances in our actual bank accounts
etc.
Whew.
What to do?
I'm still figuring that out, right alongside you, but for now I can say:
Honor your weariness.
Help your friends and kids and partners and colleagues honor theirs, too.
Slow down.
Do less.
Rest as much as you can.
Receive support.
Exchange self-criticism for self-loving care.
Choice by choice,
we'll stop writing checks our asses can't cash,
and stop feeling bad about it, too.
Love,
Natalie