The most generous thing we can do
The very most generous thing you can do, in my opinion?
Fully, truly be the Main Character in your own story.
Be who you are. Want what you want. Even and especially when it's different from what's expected.
A gif of a woman’s reflection in the mirror. As the camera pans upward, the woman is checking herself out and wearing a formal, galactic, official attire. She adjusts her long coat. Her ears are pointy, and her hair is split into two high buns.
This is challenging in a world that's constantly asking you to be part of the supporting cast.
In a world that's scripting a self-effacing role for you, all the time.
In a world that's telling you it's greedy to want more for yourself,
and inconsiderate to nurture your own interests and desires.
I say the opposite is true.
I believe our best, most valuable contributions come when we do what we really want.
Example:
Yesterday, my daughter and I came up to New York to see Judy Blume speak.
Judy talked about being a wife/mother, on a cul-de-sac in the 70's, with stories upon stories buzzing in her brain.
She talked about writing, without any writerly support.
About creating characters, without any expectations of success.
About working for herself, in a place and moment and culture where women like her mostly worked for their husbands.
Imagine if she'd ignored those buzzing stories.
Imagine if she'd withered under the glare of her neighbors.
Imagine if she didn't write about periods and masturbation and teen sex.
Thankfully: she did what she wanted, and the world is better for it.
The tendency, now, is to say, “Yeah, but that's Judy BLUME.”
The inclination is to declare her exceptional.
But really, she's exemplary.
Every exceptional person is.
Look: they're simply being who they are. Wanting what they want.
Doing their thing. Their own way.
They stand out because they're fully being themselves. And this is a gift to all of us.
Want to be exceptionally generous?
Be yourself.
love,
Natalie