You, alone, can't fix it.

First of all: THANK YOU.

After I wrote last week

of my Dad's passing,

my inbox was like this:

unnamed.gif

I appreciate you!!

NOW

Let's talk about the serious drawback

to being a kickass

super-capable

hold-myself-to-high-standards

kind of person.

I find

when we're used to being badass

at most things we do,

we can begin to believe

that making things work

is entirely up to us.

No one else can do it as well as I can,

we think.

I have to make the right decision,

we heft onto our shoulders.

I alone can fix it.

. . .

Oh wait.

That one sounds familiar.

Friends: that's what our disgusting president once said.

I alone can fix it.

That is b u l l s h i t,

and we must steer clear of it.

*

What is truer

and much more empowering

is this:

We co-create reality.

It's never all up to one person.

We cannot fix anything -

a relationship,

a work situation,

a health problem,

a financial trouble,

by ourselves.

When we make a choice,

we aren't single-handedly

deciding the path ahead.

What happens next

is never entirely up to us.

We live on planet Earth,

where chance and luck

and maybe fate

and certainly other humans

all play a role.

So

if you're currently agonizing over

Making the Right Choice

or

Fixing the Relationship

or

Solving the Problem,

please give yourself a break.

Remember it's not all up to you.

You are powerful

YES

but none of us are doing this alone.

So

Instead of How Do I Fix It?,

ask yourself these:

What do I value?

What's the contribution I want to make?

Who and what can support me in this co-creation?


And then take one small step

in one of those directions.

And maybe also have a cookie.

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in praise of half-assery