Maaaan, the woman is Non Stop.
There is a part of me who pushes and pulls.
She is Never Satisfied.
She always wants better and more: for the world, and from me,
and she always wants to run the show of my life.
When she's in charge, I'm up far before the sun is.
I'm down on the floor, doing a full breathing practice.
Then some stretches.
Then some journaling.
This Never Satisfied part of me next wants to meditate,
but also a headstart on this letter I'm writing to you
and also quiet time with all the other writing
oh but maybe to prepare an exquisite breakfast
or have high quality snuggles with the partner still in bed
or maybe with the children
(the children don't get enough snuggles, do they)
oh actually an exquisite breakfast for all of them
(they say breakfast is so important)
no, maybe a sunrise walk with the dogs
(the dogs don't get enough walking, do they, and neither do I)
oh but sure to have it done by 8:30a
because then it's Sunday morning Pilates
followed up by trips to the two different groceries
(so all the best groceries are procured)
followed up by the networking lunch
(Sunday was the only day we're both “free”)
speaking of Free Time, I really must create more of it
etc.
As you can see, this Never Satisfied part of me is a LOT.
She wants a lot.
Her standards are so high.
She wants Only The Best. Everywhere. For everyone.
I'm telling you because maybe you have this part, too.
I want to help you see it as simply a single aspect of who you are.
One part of many.
And I want you to know:
I get it.
I know this relentless one inside,
for whom it's Never Enough.
For you and me both,
I'm learning to love her, because she's not going anywhere.
To thank and appreciate her,
because damn she does do amazing things.
And I'm learning to partner her with my more relaxed and spacious parts,
so she really does help us make the most of this precious life
rather than run us into the ground.
You can join me.
As you know, we ride at dawn.
But we're learning and growing to move forward with
less urgency,
more support,
less criticism,
more compassion,
less Running Out of Time
more Look Around at How Lucky We Are to Be Alive Right Now.
love,
Natalie